In the March 28 issue, there was an article written by Bard Hovenga titled “Finding Real Commitment.”
As I read through the article, I began to think a lot about the relationships I have made here at Creighton.
One of the most difficult lessons I have learned since entering college has been the fact that every friendship I make is not going to last a lifetime.
There are going to be people that come into your life, and during that time you wouldn’t know what to do without them.
However, as time passes, and our lives change, that friend will leave.
It is neither good nor bad, it’s just life. As I continued reading the article, Bard pointed out a number of issues that we, as young people, have today in developing relationships.
In particular, communication and commitment.
More and more I see myself and people around me talking, but not really saying anything.
As I walk down the mall, people will say, “How are you?” Of course, the standard reply is “Good, and you?”
I’m just as guilty of this as anyone, but let’s be honest. As a college student, are you ever really good?
Odds are you are tired, have at least one paper to write or a test to study for and you haven’t eaten anything besides Brandeis or fast food in the last week.
I have also walked down campus and heard a number of discussions dealing with philosophy, politics and other social issues.
Which, don’t get me wrong, is great, but when is the last time you looked a friend in the eye and sincerely asked how he or she was doing?
How are things back home? Are you doing well in organic chemistry, or history or calculus?
Then after you ask the question, LISTEN. Don’t solve the problem. Just listen.
The second issue Bard spoke about was commitment. Here’s my question: what ever happened to dating?
You know, when you would take a person out that you were interested in and get to know them.
For some reason, our generation doesn’t date. We seem to either hang out and “hookup” (which to this day I don’t know what the definition is), or we are in a relationship.
It’s kind of hard to form a foundation on that, and that’s without considering the constant games we play with each other.
I hope people that read Bard’s article and this response will take the time to think about their own relationships and how they interact with those they truly care about.
Because guess what, for one reason or another, they may not always be there.
Thank you Bard for your article. It’s never easy to speak the truth, especially when it is difficult enough to be honest with ourselves.
Nicholas Andrews, Arts & Sciences senior