Bring back going steady.
Maybe I belong in the 1950s or am being nostalgic, but I want βgoing steadyβ to make a comeback. I thrive on the simplicity of the yesteryears.
The story used to go like this: two people meet, one asks the other out, they date and then some sort of tangible evidence was given to validate their βgoing steadyβ status.
Todayβs romantic relationships are perplexing at best. The story nowadays is two people meet, they βtalkβ (not quite in a relationship, but not out of the realm of possibilities either) and may or may not hook up. Dating may or may not occur but is usually referred to as βhanging out.β
Bring back the simple steps. Quit overcomplicating things.
Dating could mean so many things. You could be casually dating or you could be in an actual relationship. How will you ever know what someone means when they say they are dating someone?
I am well aware that casually dating is becoming rarer by the minute, but it is needed to set the stage for when you are officially βgoing steadyβ with someone or still just casually dating them. Nowadays when you ask someone how they came to be in a relationship, the answer runs along the lines of: βit just kind of happened.β Where is the line in the sand that is crossed when a couple goes from casual dating to exclusively dating?
Being in a serious relationship with someone should not βjust kind of happen.β Bringing back going steady would solve the problem of the βare we exclusively dating or are we not?β dilemma.
βGoing steadyβ can be a little vague, so I delved into the dark depths of YouTube and found a 1950s short film on the issues of going steady. A boy, Jeff, was asking his father for advice because the kids at school have gotten the idea that Jeff and Marie, a girl he is seeing casually, are going steady. More than likely, Jeff thinks of himself and Marie as just βhanging out.β
Jeffβs father explained βgoing steadyβ as, βYou havenβt dated anyone else for quite a while. You just sort of go steady. Perhaps that is the best way to go about it. Youβve dated Marie a few times. Youβve enjoyed the dates together. You are in the habit of dating each other. As long as you donβt make any commitments, as long as you two donβt expect too much of each other.β Dear Jeffβs father, you are zero help.
Jeff has run into the age-old dilemma of βis it exclusive or notβ and doesnβt know if he wants to make the leap into a serious commitment. All of this could have been solved with a simple adult conversation between him and Marie over whether or not they are going steady.
The term βgoing steadyβ needs to make a comeback to help us define relationships, because in the end βhanging outβ is way too vague.