So here we are. After nearly a year of speculation and sports that many people pretended to care about, we have reached the beginning of the college basketball season.
Creighton is coming correct this season with new players, a new logo and most importantly, a new conference. Or an old conference. Or a conference that was old but is now new. The Big East is complicated.
To help with some of the confusion, I’m here to take you on a tour of the Big East (or “new Big East,” depending on how lame you want to be throughout the season) from a basketball perspective. Maybe by the end of this it will be more clear where exactly Creighton stacks up to the competition.
When someone discusses the history of the Big East, the story usually begins and ends with Georgetown University. The story is usually easy to recreate, because it goes like this: “Hey, remember when Georgetown had [future NBA Hall of Famer] and they suffered that soul-crushing defeat in the NCAA Tournament?” Seriously, Fred Brown, James Worthy was not on your team. Georgetown has seen some of basketball’s greatest players put on a Hoya uniform, and has also provided some of basketball’s eternal questions. Why did Patrick Ewing wear a T-shirt under his jersey? Did Iverson really hit that woman with a chair? Who wants to sex Mutombo? Georgetown faces a few questions this season as well. How are they going to replace Greg Whittington? Will Josh Smith’s move from L.A. to D.C. work out as well as Eric Wright’s? Only time will tell.
On the other side of the history coin is Providence College, located in Providence, R.I., which was the inexplicable headquarters for the Big East for years. Providence is famous for Ryan Gomes and turning a literal New York City basketball-playing God into a guy who lasted only one season on the bench for the Wizards. It’s a good thing Skip 2 My Lou never went there. I can’t wait until Creighton beats Providence because the valedictorian of the class behind me in high school went there. I hope she’s prepared for a barrage of “Who’s president of the student council now?” texts.
The new headquarters for the Big East will be in New York City, home to St. John’s University. St. John’s has done a good job remaining popular while having to overcome the nickname “Red Storm.” Nothing says “We’re a high school that had a racist nickname and we put the minimum amount of effort in to change it” more than “Red Storm.” Now that I think about it, a Hoya isn’t even a thing either. Step your game up, Big East nicknames. On a positive note, the Red Storm has three players on their roster with apostrophes in their first names. That’s the coolest thing ever.
Also located in New York City (well, the New York City half of New Jersey) is Seton Hall. Because Seton Hall’s student radio station was kind enough to have me on the air Saturday afternoon, I’m not going to make any jokes about them. The Seton Hall men’s basketball team plays basketball against teams from other schools. They have been active for 100 years and have had three All-Americans. Just saying facts over here.
Villanova has the unfortunate distinction of being an original Big East team that wasn’t actually a part of the original Big East. They decided to hang out in the A-10 for an extra year before jumping up to the big leagues. Oddly enough, the excuse of basketball reasons might actually be a valid one. Nova is a bastion for guards, specifically guards that don’t exactly pan out in the pros. Everyone remembers Ray Allen, no one remembers Allan Ray.
DePaul University was an independent entity until 1991. Since then, the Blue Demons have been charter members of two conferences and also helped in this most recent Big East mutiny. I don’t trust them. It’s only a matter of time before DePaul jumps ship and founds the Greater Big East Midwest Conference of the USA. Marquette would want to join immediately.
Speaking of Marquette, the Golden Eagles have had tremendous success so far this school year. Many pundits have also picked Marquette to win the conference in men’s basketball as well. So what’s wrong in Milwaukee? Well, Aaron Rodgers is hurt, so that’s something. Enjoy your precious “conference titles” while having to watch Seneca Wallace on Sundays. Zing, Marquette, don’t mess with me.
Joining Creighton as new to the conference is Butler University. The Bulldogs may define limping into a new situation. The national darling has to figure out how to win without coaching wunderkind Brad Stevens. Stevens, as you may recall, left Butler to help my Celtics tank harder than the Eastern Front. Butler will likely be doing the same, only there’s no Andrew Wiggins to look forward to. Butler is my pick for most surprising Creighton conference loss this year because of course Creighton will lose to Butler.
Xavier rounds out Creighton’s conference foes. The Musketeers are unique, being the only NCAA basketball team comprised entirely of gangsters (if Tu Holloway is to be believed). It makes sense, considering David West belongs to the Order of the Assassins and I’m pretty sure Kenny Frease has used his college education to embark on a life of crime in an effort to fund a cure for his cryogenically frozen wife. The moral of the story here is don’t mess with Xavier.
But wait, there’s more! You thought Creighton was going to be let off that easily? I actually outsourced this part, because I believe sharing is caring.
Sean Bailey, sports editor for The Cowl (Providence College) would like to know, “Have they even moved past the peach baskets yet?”
I’d also like to give a shout out to Georgetown basketball beat writer Pat Curran, who has this message for Creighton.
“Welcome to the big leagues, Creighton! Don’t worry, we won’t be too hard on you. How could we? You’re a nice Jesuit school — just like us, except way more adorable, with your quaint little campus out in Wyoming or Kansas or wherever the hell it is. We like you guys.
That said, we have to talk about this silly ‘real basketball school’ act you’ve been putting on. We’re mildly concerned that all this hoopla — over Doug McDermott and Coach McDermott and, um, he’s gotta have a brother or something, right? — is starting to overshadow who the real big dogs are around here (Hint: Us).
So keep doing your thing. Eat your steaks, buy your stocks, win a few games here and there to convince people we have a ‘deep’ conference. We’ll have a great time! But when you come to the District, remember who runs the show. Get any funny ideas, and your boy Dougie’s going to find himself on the wrong side of a brand-new Josh Smith poster.
Welcome to Washington.”
Well isn’t that special? As for me, I have Creighton going 24-6 in the regular season with both the regular season and conference tournament titles. The Bluejays will capitalize on this success by losing their second tournament game to Minnesota on a buzzer beater. It will be a perfectly Creighton ending and also give me horrifying flashbacks from the 2002 Men’s Frozen Four.