As the fall semester winds down, the chatter on the mall shifts to spring semester and with it, the beginning of recruitment season for Greek life. The thought of getting dressed up, juggling social events and facing the judgement of their peers fills some with excitement and some with fear. All in all, it is a period of uncertainty, anxiety and exhaustion for those who attempt to join Greek life. 

Freshman year, during an unusually cold week in January, I joined the swarms of girls trekking down to Harper in dresses and heels. I attended recruitment and discovered an environment where my personality and confidence were judged for what was “suitable” to the sorority. Coming home each night feeling drained and rejected, I realized recruitment (and sorority life) was not for me. After the third day, I made the decision to walk away from recruitment and the prospect of joining a sorority.  

Some have described joining their sorority or fraternity as feeling like ‘coming home’ and I worried that I missed out on that opportunity for community. But in the days afterwards, I realized that life would go on. I found that many of my friends either did not go through recruitment or dropped out after negative experiences like I did.  

Now, as a senior, I can confidently say that my social life did not suffer because I refused to join a sorority. I found a group of friends who love and support me. Some are a part of Greek life, some are not. Not joining meant I had more time to build friendships naturally and focus on things I actually enjoy — and I still get invited to date parties.  

In fact, by senior year, almost all of my friends have dropped out or seriously considered dropping out of their sorority. They remind me often that I ‘dodged a bullet’ when they’re dealing with sorority drama. 

I’m not here to convince you to avoid Greek life altogether. Just remember: social groups do not determine your value. If you decide to attend recruitment, good luck! Try to enjoy the process, keep an open mind and listen to yourself. If you feel like you don’t belong, just know that nobody feels completely at home among strangers. It is OK to say no to Greek life.  

Sororities and fraternities can be great for some, but your worth, your community and your college experience won’t disappear if you decide it’s not for you. You will find your people — whether or not they wear Greek letters.