When I began watching “Sex and The City” this summer, I was enamored with Carrie Bradshaw, the show’s central character and narrator, in the earlier seasons. She was witty, vivacious and completely committed to her own growth. She wasn’t afraid to dump a guy after a bad first date and she supported her friends during their own struggles. I was inspired by her fashion and I began wondering where all the online hate for her was coming from.  

Then I got to season three, and I had my moment of understanding. Carrie betrayed herself to love a man –– Mr. Big –– and in doing so, distanced herself from her friends. I have participated in this cycle of friend-distancing, as have many of my own friends.  The older I get, the more immature it appears to me. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t grant women who do this a sympathetic olive branch. If you go on TikTok, Instagram, or truly any platform you use, you will see two divided sides: the hyper-independent women or women who prioritize romantic relationships. It feels claustrophobic. Mistakes aren’t allowed, and friendships are conditional on the absence of a man or the need to have one.  

Neither extreme is positive, because both box you into a specific life before you are old enough to have experienced a taste of the world. How do we deal with friends who drift into these categories, or make choices that we ourselves disagree with? I believe we should make space for them. Carrie messed up, embarrassed herself and continually repeated patterns her friends all warned her against –– but she still made them laugh and brought her amazing self to the table underneath all her Big baggage. Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte stuck beside her, and I think this is what we need to continually bring to our own friendships in 2026. People grow and change, and if we love our friends for who they are now, we can create a context for them to be better people through honesty, compassion and criticism, if the situation calls for it.  

So, if your friend keeps going out with a guy she says she hates, or if she’s blowing you off for her own Mr. Big, take a breath. College is one of the freest times of our lives –– the perfect combination for knowing yourself deeply, and an environment where betraying yourself is almost unavoidable. Forgiveness is necessary for maintaining long-term friendships, and if you can laugh about past mistakes together, you can rest assured that your friendship isn’t going anywhere.