We spend so much time worrying about how others perceive us that we forget some of life’s best moments come from letting our guard down.

Over the summer, I got pretty into karaoke. I would go with my brother and our friends, choosing songs with the same focus and strategy I imagine is present in a naval war room, hyping each other up as we belted and moved. I am by no means a good singer, and I often forgot the words, but those nights were by far some of the highlights of my summer. As I started this semester, I wanted to figure out a way to bring the same electricity that was present on those karaoke nights to my final year here at Creighton. As I reflected, I realized that these moments, and many more of my favorite college memories, came from deliberately choosing to do something a little embarrassing. 

With the constant prospect of being recorded and having our behavior saved, sent or posted, our generation is more averse than ever to doing anything potentially embarrassing, unfortunately including the things that make college, and our lives, the most fulfilling. We won’t dance, we won’t sing, we won’t be the first to reach out; even walking down the mall with an umbrella is embarrassing in our eyes. By avoiding any chance of social shame, we are denying ourselves opportunities for growth, connection and fun. 

The coolest, most confident person you know was not born that way. People gain their swag by facing embarrassment and doing something anyways. Your favorite artist at one point had to say “screw it” and sing their songs in front of people. Your favorite actor had to embarrass themselves in auditions until they were good enough to make it to the screen. That professor you look up to once had to defend the thesis they worked on for years in order earn their Ph.D. You won’t gain anything from standing in the corner and doing nothing. You’re going to have to risk making a fool of yourself sometimes. 

Studies show that the physical signs of shame, such as blushing or stammering, make people like and trust someone more. Being able to let your guard down and be more human in front of someone will bond you more than staying cool would. I can’t tell you how many friends I’ve made on campus just because I did something silly or stupid in front of them. Would you rather have friends who are focused on their image and avoiding discomfort, or do you want to be around people who live their lives unrestricted, taking every chance to have fun?  

So, as we start the year, I encourage you to embrace the embarrassment. Sing that song you know by heart in front of everyone. Talk to your class crush. Wear that funky outfit with pride. As Austin Butler said, “Embarrassment is an under-explored emotion. Go make a fool of yourself. Just go for it. Feel the cringe, feel the fear … because everything you want is on the other side of that.”